The ‘blue screen of death’…

We probably have all experienced that gut wrenching moment when the computer unexpectedly freezes right smack bang in the middle of something you really can’t afford to lose. And no matter what quirky computer freeze image the coders come up with to dull that pain – the latest Microsoft blue screen with sideway old school unhappy face emoji in font size 160 pt (no Microsoft, size of emoji does not express greater empathy for the predicament) or the Apple ‘happy’ rainbow spinning wheel (no Apple, there is no happy pot of gold at the end of this rainbow) – there are those few seconds of dread as you fully absorb the impact of the crash and no imagery will soften the blow.

So, can there ever be a funny ending to a computer crash? Well, possibly when you can see it from an even worse outcome beyond the loss of time and data.

I recall the time at work (over 15 years ago now – Eek – has it been that long?!) when I was confronted with the blue screen of death. In despair I called the IT Helpdesk, which had recently been moved to an offshore service provider who spoke english as their second language. The story went a bit like this…

• Me “Hello, I want to report a blue screen of death.”
• Voice on telephone “Um ma’am, can you please repeat?”
• Me “I wish to report a blue screen of death. It’s completely dead and nothing I have tried has fixed the situation.”
• Voice on telephone “Ma’am, this is most alarming. Who is it? Are you sure they are not breathing? I think you need to call an ambulance immediately.”

Do you have a blue screen story? Let me know.